I try to keep a positive attitude about my condition, but
sometimes it gets to me. I never want
this blog to be a “bitch fest” or have a “poor me” vibe, because that’s definitely
not how I feel. I know I have a great
life and I also know I am not dying from MRKH, but sometimes I just want to
scream.
Lately I have been complaining to my husband about things
that bother me (after all, isn’t that why you get married?), and he is
wonderful. He listens to me, gives me
advice when I ask for it, and lends his shoulder for me to cry on. He has also told me on a number of occasions
that I should blog more because there are people out there at feel the same way
as me, but like I mentioned before I never wanted this to be a place where I
complain.
So here I go…I’m going to complain / vent for the next couple
paragraph.
I do not want to spend an ENTIRE party talking about leaky
vagina's, breast feeding, formulas, fertility meds, trying to get pregnant, morning
sickness, ultrasounds (which by the way, all look the same!)…You get the
point. I don’t want to sound like I don’t
care about these things, because I do, however, I don’t not want to spend my Saturday
evening in a group talking about these things.
I have absolutely nothing to contribute to these conversations and they
sometimes make me sad ( I mean, I want a leaky vagina some day). I love having
these conversations in one on one setting, with my friends, not at a party (ALL
NIGHT LONG). See the difference?
Baby showers…Please have alcohol.
I don’t really care to hear “you are so lucky that you don’t
have your period”, “You will get to have a baby without going through the 9
months of pregnancy”, “At least your body wont change because of a baby”, “your
boobs wont sag”…blah blah blah. I would rather be able to have a baby when I
want, without having to spend tens of thousands of dollars and have my life and
my family’s life looked at through a microscope.
The most challenging part of being in my 30’s has been
dealing with MRKH. I had always thought
that it would get easier because things seem to get easier with time, but this
does not follow that rule. My friends
are getting pregnant on purpose, and kids are everywhere. I cant help but think constantly about how I
cant give that to Jason right now. I
know he wants to be a dad, and he will be an amazing one when it happens. When
life is ready for us to extend our family, it will be an amazing journey for
us.
My 30’s have been pretty awesome. I have a great life, great
family / friends, been on some amazing vacations. I have a house I cherish, a pretty sweet
husband, a dog and a cat who I love dearly and most importantly I am healthy
and happy.
