I haven’t talked too much about what Jason and I have been
going through the last two years, not because I don’t want to share it, just
because it has been mentally exhausting. The truth is, there have been days I
have wanted to quit, I have second guessed every decision we have made, and I
have cried. We have filled out paperwork that we thought would never end (seriously, a ream of paper!), taken 100’s of hours of parenting / CPR / First Aid / Trauma…
classes, only to wonder if we will get to put our new-found skills to use. Our
backgrounds have been cleared, and our house has been “childproofed”, and our lives
have been picked through with a fine-tooth comb. (Big Sigh), I guess this is
what we signed up for. But today, we finally see light at the end of the
tunnel. We are officially licensed foster
parents! And yes, it is to become foster parents to a human (more than one
person has asked me that).
I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. I have the best
support system in the world. I don’t remember much about the day I was diagnosed
with MRKH, but I remember my doctor telling me it wasn’t going to be the
end of the world. He told me that maybe I was born this way to help a child in
a different way. I took that to heart. I always knew this was going to be my journey,
and I am lucky enough to have found my partner and best friend who wants to do it
with me. We have eight supportive parents who are excited for us, and we have a
crazy amount of family and friends who can’t wait to laugh (and probably cry)
with us.
In our ideal world, we would like to eventually adopt this child.
But this is no longer about us. We want to do what’s best for this child, and
if that means they are with us for a month, then we will do our best to make
sure it is the best month of their life.
If that means they are with us for two years, our hope is that we have given them
some skills to kick ass at life. But ultimately, this is their
journey, they will share what they want and with who they want, when they are
ready. This is not our story to share with others.
The one thing we know is that we don’t know anything. We don’t
know when we will get the call, we don’t know how old the child will be, the gender,
race, or how long they will be with us. We are excited, nervous, scared…we have
all the emotions, but are looking forward to this next chapter…whatever craziness
it may bring us.
Being a foster adopt parent was an amazing experience for me! I live in California and I fostered then adopted my kiddos! Got my daughter at 2months old and she is going to be 13! And my son at 1 1/2 months old and he is going to be 9! I wish you the best of luck and the biggest advice I can give is this.... if adoption is your plan I suggest you don’t get a child in your home till you have your adoption license as well. I don’t recall what state you are in but know this in Cali if you don’t have your adoption license with the foster license and you get a child in your home that you decide to adopt and get your license later you risk losing that child. There focus is on the child of course and they will not wait for you to have that adoption license (they say there is no guarantee that you will get it) and they can remove the child from your home to place him or her in a licensed home. Just a little advice from someone who has gone through the system twice. Best of luck!!! It was the best thing I ever did!!
ReplyDeleteLiz and I look forward to supporting you! My parents were foster parents. I know they would be beaming with pride! Let's go! Love, Dad
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